Really just hoping for better and brighter things.Jan272014
I officially converted to the dark side and got an iPhone.
One thing I realized getting this is that I can’t sync anything from my iTunes to my iPhone since my MacBook is too old.
However, on a good note at least I can finally communicate with people with no problem.
It’s just a little weird since Its not something I’m used to but I guess I’ll get used to it.
Since I’m new at this, anyone have any suggestions for any apps, battery saving tips or places where I can buy accessories or cases for an in expensive price?Dec082013
Just checked my card to see how much money I had and found out I had $12.10 in my card.
As much as I want to buy Christmas gifts, I’m just really sad on how I can find a way to pull pennies to afford anything.
I just wish and hope I can afford to get my loved ones a little something for the holidays.
I don’t celebrate the holidays as is it is and now I just feel like crap not being able to pay for things to give :(Dec032013
I am hoping all this work, networking, interning, & school will all work out for me in the end.
As much as enjoy working hard & doing things just because, after a while it just gets exhausting.
I know it’s my choice to do extra little things but I wished I got some kind of acknowledgment instead of being judged for it.
Until then, I have to do what I gotta do.
Here comes the next week and a half of late night studying of Math. As much I want to sleep, I still need to pass.
Let the long work hours, commuting through traffic, getting with the media, and burning eyes of studying begin.Dec032013
Today, I realized that I have had “La La” by The Cab as my ringtone for over 2 years now. I also realized it is my #1 played song on my iTunes and I played it on repeat for a whole hour before work.
After, I played every Summer Set song I ever owned from their EP’s to Legendary while studying for Math.
Even though I have been distant from listening to The Cab & The Summer Set for a while now, I can never seem to forget them. From taking my posters down, storing away all my merch, and even pressing next on my music playlist, it’s always there.
I guess over these last few months, I have tried to “grow up” since majority of the time people don’t take me seriously since I was too “crazy” for these bands. As much as I would like to stop listening to them, it just seems to bittersweet.
Some may never understand, but these two bands in particular will always have a place in my heart. Thank you for all the friendships you guys helped me created, the shows you performed, photos you took, conversations we’ve made, merch you sold, and all the other memories.
If it wasn’t for listening to these two bands, I probably would never be going for what I love or be where I am at today. It probably would never cross their way, but I just want to say “Thank You” to these two bands. I always seem repetitive about this but it is what it really is.
Regardless of whatever happens in the future, I will never forget you guys. Even if I stop going to shows or whatever, I will never regret this part of my life. I know this is just a pointless Tumblr post that may make me sound like a “fan girl” but whatever. Thank you guys for everything.Nov232013
I’m never the person to really talk about “relationships,” unless if someone mentioned it to me or else. Just hearing the word “relationship,” has always been a sacred word to me.
For one thing, in my Twenty-Two years of living, I honestly have never been in a “real relationship.” I’ve dated, talked, hooked-up, and stuff but even still, I don’t consider it.
Sure, I’ve had my moments when I wished I could have a significant other, boyfriend, boo thang etc. but I guess it never seemed to really get to me.
Over the last three years in general, the whole “relationship,” thing never really was my priority since I would rather go out, have my fun with both my girl and guy friends, check out other guys and practically do whatever I wanted. I’m not gonna say that I never had any attraction to any guy but I still have a couple that made me think twice. I probably tried to take a few chances but I guess in my side, I just “wait to long” for it.
Out of every night I am up thinking, in this one particular night it really got me thinking..
From all my friends, elementary, middle, high and college, and even family I am one of the few from my group that hasn’t been in a serious relationship. I have friends that are getting married, starting families and I just sit here like “Damn, I can’t even get myself a boyfriend let alone a date..”
Now that it’s “cuddle weather,” everyone has their boyfriends or girlfriends to either snuggle with or share that New Years Kiss with. Me? Of course I am in the same boat like every year, alone.
I always say I am “forever alone,” because I’m really in that state of mind of being alone. I eat out alone, go shopping alone, go to school alone, drive to far places alone etc. Even though being “alone” gets tough, at the same time I think to myself if I had someone, I wouldn’t be able to do these things “alone.”
These past three years in general have definitely been a whirlpool. Learning to grow as a person, going to thick and thin with school, meeting and engaging with new people, doing things I would and would never do before and just learning about myself in general. The one thing missing from all of this really is the key word “relationship.”
This whole “relationship” thing will always be a bittersweet thing to me. There are those moments where I sometimes wish I could have someone but then I’m glad I’m single. Is it because I’m too picky, looking for the right one, or more selfish of myself? Am I too scared to be in a relationship or even just scared for someone to let me down.. Having someone for me never seems to cross my mind unless if someone initiates it.
Being twenty-two and all, the one thing I’m glad is that my family never asks me when I’ll marry or if I’m even dating anyone. Even though I never had a real significant other, I’ve been though my moments with relationships with others. Divorce, break-ups, cheaters.. you name it, I’ve witnessed it.
Coming through this topic, even though I may not be looking for a relationship, there is probably one reason why I would want to be in one. If I were to be in a relationship right this moment, it’s not to wish for my happiness, but just to show my Dad that I can find someone for my own.
My Dad isn’t getting younger and now when I think about it, he is the only person who’s opinion I would ever care for if I were to be in one. My Dad doesn’t encourage it, but even though my Dad may talk about being successful, making money and such, I think the only thing he really worries about is if I would ever find someone in life.
My Dad himself has been through a divorce and also witnessing two others with my siblings. He’s the one that everyone goes to when someone’s broken their heart or even did them dirty. He never tells me but I know my Dad wishes I could find someone who I guess who could love me for who I am I guess..
I know I am going of topic here but call me naive, “non experienced,” whatever, I will probably never get the concept of “relationship.” I don’t know if I’ll ever find someone or even meet someone everyone I would like but “relationships” will always be a bittersweet thing to me.
As for now, I will leave it as I will be that person admiring others and other couples by myself. For the time being, I will still go out, have fun, and of course do it by myself.
Forgive me for this unnecessary post.Nov082013
I just really wanna graduate college, get a really good career, but still do what I love. Is that really hard to for?Nov072013
Really just hoping for better days.Oct272013
Keeping myself occupied with things. I’m still trying to find a hobby that suits me.
However, after documenting my food over the last 5 years ago, I decided to create a Yelp account with all the future restaurant (new) and maybe even some returnable favorites. If you like to check them out, here you go.
Ever since I was a kid I had a problem with my skin. I had skin allergies and always struggled for the “perfect skin.” After high school, I began an interest in makeup. Even though I’m not the greatest and I still have problematic skin (acne), I have tried many and began even to study products over my free time to help suggest them to my friends. It’s still in the works but I made a Luvocracy account, where I will post some of my favorites for the month where you not only can see my reviews but also purchase them right off the site.
As for other news if you do want to get updated, follow me here!Oct182013
“Note To Self : Everyone changes even you. You just have to learn how to accept it.”
“Most days I wish I never met you because then I could sleep at night and I wouldn’t have to walk around with the knowledge there was someone like you out there.”
- Good Will Hunting (1997)
I took down the decorations in my car, cleaned out clothes from my closet, and took down the only posters I had up from one of my favorite bands, The Summer Set.
Lately I’ve been doing about all the things I’ve done over the last few years. All the crazy things I’ve done & come across that I probably would never think I would do in my life.
These last few months have given me a realization of all the things I’ve done. Since I wasn’t able to attend the school I wanted to go to, that memory of that one call just goes back everytime someone asks me “What school did you decide to go to?”
I’ve felt as if my dreams we’re crushed and slowly but surely, everything just seems to be downhill. While majority of my friends graduated or transferred, I’m stuck back at one.
While I have cousins,even younger than me graduating college, I’m still trying to pass my classes.
While I hear my friends getting tons of hours, interning, im stuck figuring out how to stretch my paycheck to help get everyday needs & saving to reapply.
Tonight I’ve learned I have become the biggest disappointment. I’m a 22 year old college student who needs to grow up.
Sorry to everyone I’ve disappointed. Sorry to everyone that thinks that I don’t think of others. Sorry to everyone who thinks that all I do is go out. Sorry to everyone who thinks that I will never grow up because I like too much Disney or my music is too “young.”
Maybe being alone and thinking isn’t so bad..Sep302013
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